Spam like not? Delete heaven email your sister!

I get an inordinate amount of spam email in my work email account. It automatically goes into my deleted items, but I have to wade through it once a day because sometimes real emails go there.

Today was an especially rich day! Here are a few of the opportunities I passed on:

Your loan request approved!

Looking for singles?

High quality replica watches

So carbonium a mineralogy [no idea?!]

Man, listen to me, give yourself 3 inches longer [hmmm . . .]

Expel disgusting fats [yes, finally!]

We can help you to feel better! [really?]

Emmy teen [how about "Emily mom" instead?]

To the militarist [how’d they know?]

Human Growth Hormone

My he shields [always wear your raincoat!]

Sir, your product works like no other [I know]

Sex all day long? You can do this! [really?]

Follower owe organized sedun [but, of course!]

And my personal favourite:

Form slip nudity gays [the sender of this one is “Aniston Fucking”]


Ah, the sweet rhythms of Engrish on an otherwise boring Tuesday!